Wedding Ceremony Order of Events: Where the Music Goes and Who Cues It

Dylan Galvin is a live events performer who has performed across the United States since 2009, now based in the DMV (Washington DC, Maryland, and Virginia), more than 1,500 events. Mentored by music legends John Mayer, Paul Simon and Livingston Taylor.

The middle of a wedding ceremony needs no music. In my last 10 ceremonies I played zero songs between the bride's walk and the recessional, and in my entire career a unity ritual or a signing has never once had music under it.

This page is for the couple, or the planner working for them, who is writing the wedding ceremony order of events and booking its music. Music goes in a handful of places: before the ceremony, on one transition track, at the walks, at the exit and in the handoff to cocktail hour. The planner usually cues the musician, and how long each walk runs gets settled in the room. The standard order of events follows published guides, and this page adds the music layer from the side of the person who plays it.

One word first. When I say prelude, I mean the one song that moves the room from the pre-ceremony music into the ceremony itself. Some people call the entire pre-ceremony set the prelude. On this page I call the whole set pre-ceremony music.

The Order of Events With the Music Marked

A standard non-religious ceremony, as Joy's guide to the wedding ceremony order of events lays it out, runs prelude music, the seating of grandparents and parents, the wedding party and bride processionals, opening words, readings, the officiant's address, vows, the ring exchange, an optional unity ceremony, the pronouncement, the first kiss, the introduction of the couple and the recessional. Zola's ceremony outline groups the same events into three phases: the processional, the ceremony and the recessional. Music has a line in only some of those steps.

This is one way to run it. Other acts split it differently, so ask yours how it splits.

1. Pre-ceremony music plays for 5 to 45 minutes, instrumental and acoustic, while guests arrive.
2. One transition track plays right before the ceremony starts and cues the first song of the ceremony. It can be extended if the planner or the wedding party is running late.
3. The wedding party's processional follows.
4. The bride's walk follows the party.
5. The ceremony itself runs from the bride's walk to the recessional with no music.
6. The recessional starts at the kiss or a few seconds after it, and the call is made in the moment.
7. The handoff into cocktail hour music happens once the recessional is over.

Generally, the planner cues the musician for all of this. Who gives each cue is covered below. For how the walk songs themselves are cued, timed and arranged, see the guide to wedding processional songs with a live musician. For music across the rest of the wedding day, the wedding music page is the hub.

Pre-Ceremony Music Runs 5 to 45 Minutes, Then One Track Hands Off to the Ceremony

Pre-ceremony music is the set that plays while guests arrive and find their seats. It can go anywhere from 5 to 45 minutes and usually runs about 30. Guides such as Joy's start the music 20 to 30 minutes before the ceremony.

In this run-of-show the set is instrumental acoustic music. One way to play it is fingerstyle instrumentals with a loop pedal. Another is instrumental acoustic tracks through the speakers with live guitar played over them. Other acts handle it differently. For how the speakers are set up at a ceremony, see this comparison of wedding ceremony sound systems.

The transition track, sometimes called the prelude song, is the one song that moves the room from the pre-ceremony music into the ceremony. It works as a preemptive cue for the first song of the ceremony, and it can be extended if the planner or the wedding party is running late. Planning guides such as Joy's use "prelude" for the whole pre-ceremony set. The page on wedding prelude songs with a live musician covers the set, late starts and how long the track can run.

Who Cues the Musician

The cue usually comes from the day-of coordinator or the coordinator's assistant, sometimes over a walkie-talkie. The officiant is rarely the one. The couple never is, because coordinating vendors is not their job. Sometimes the wedding party skips the planner's plan and starts walking, and then the musician takes the party's first steps as the cue. With no cue at all, the musician uses judgment. Joy's guide lists forgetting to cue the musicians among its common mistakes and recommends assigning a coordinator or a trusted usher to signal them.

A live musician can also extend an arrangement section by section when a walk runs long. That adjusts how much of the song is played and leaves the tempo alone.

The Wedding Party's Walk Runs From 20 Seconds to About Two and a Half Minutes

In my last 10 ceremonies, the shortest wedding party walk lasted 20 seconds. It had one bridesmaid. The longest lasted about two and a half minutes. It had about eight people walking slowly through a very long area.

What sets the length is the number of people in the party, how fast they walk and the distance from the start to the altar.

Two facts are worth passing to the musician: how many people are in the party and how far the walk is. The music is fitted to the walk after it starts.

The bride's walk takes anywhere from 20 seconds to a minute, depending on how far the walkway to the altar is and how energetic or nervous the bride is. Most of the time someone walks with her, holding her dress or guiding her so she stays on pace. Almost never does she take longer than a minute from her cue to the altar. Before the bride's walk, the pause in the music is the guests' cue to stand, or the officiant tells them to stand.

A Very Short Ceremony Can Run on Two Songs

The standing plan is three songs: one for the wedding party, one for the bride and one for the exit.

At one recent wedding that was extremely short, there was not enough time for a processional and a bridal walk, because only one woman was in the bride's party. The bridal walk song also served as the processional, so the ceremony had two songs in total.

The Middle of the Ceremony Has No Music

At the ceremonies I play, music has never been asked for over a reading, a unity ritual, the signing or the vows. This is where silence is golden and everyone's focus is on the bride and groom. It is very unusual to put music in any of these moments.

In my entire career, no unity ritual or signing has had music over it. I don't recommend it. These sections are generally very short, and music during them is going to be distracting. I recommend silence.

The Exit Song Plays Through, Then the Music Hands Off to Cocktail Hour

Right after the kiss, there are a few seconds for the guests to clap and for the officiant to finish the announcement. If the officiant has already announced the couple before the kiss, the music can start right at the kiss, or the musician can hold off until the kiss ends and the clapping dies down. Both are a matter of taste and usually get decided in the moment. It is more a felt thing than a formula.

The walkout song is generally higher energy than the processional and the bride's walk. The silence of the ceremony is over and the energy can go way up. Vocals can work at the recessional when the song has meaningful lyrics. The song usually plays all the way through, about three to five minutes, because it is not holding up another part of the ceremony.

The handoff to cocktail hour does not happen all at once. Guests are still getting out of their chairs while others are already arriving at cocktail hour, so the ceremony needs a smooth fade or ending, and the arriving guests should not sit in silence for long. Usually there is only a couple of minutes to move from one location to the other. When a wedding has several musicians, or a musician and a DJ, they need to coordinate the handoff so two songs do not play at once, unless the two locations are far enough apart not to bleed into each other.

FAQ: Wedding Ceremony Music and the Order of Events

How long is a ceremony, and how long do its parts run?

Joy's guide puts a simple civil ceremony at 15 to 20 minutes and a civil ceremony with readings at 25 to 35. It gives readings 2 to 5 minutes each, the officiant's address 3 to 7, vows 3 to 8, the ring exchange 2 to 3 and an optional unity ceremony 3 to 5. Those minutes are Joy's. They are not counted from the ceremonies described on this page.

Does a religious or traditional ceremony change the music?

It can, because a house of worship may set the music itself. Some old traditional churches require instrumental hymns or organ music, and by the time a couple reaches the musician, the venue has already given them all the restrictions. Joy's guide prints separate orders for Catholic and Jewish ceremonies, and the Jewish order includes the breaking of the glass before the recessional. Ask the venue what it requires before building the music plan.

Name the Cue-Giver and Leave the Middle Silent

In the written order of events, each music line names the moment, the person who cues it, the song, the version of the song and the artist, and the middle of the ceremony gets no line. Nothing is worse than getting ready to walk down the aisle and hearing a song that wasn't the one discussed, and communication is probably the number one thing. Asking to hear a snippet of the arrangement ahead of time also gives a sense of what it sounds like. The page on how song requests work with a live musician covers sending the ceremony songs ahead.

Quick Recap

• Music has a line at arrival, on one transition track, at the two walks and at the exit, then hands off to cocktail hour.
• Pre-ceremony music runs 5 to 45 minutes, and the transition track closes it.
• Cues usually come from the day-of coordinator or an assistant, and a party that starts early cues the musician by walking.
• Over 10 ceremonies the wedding party's walk ranged from 20 seconds (one bridesmaid) to about 2.5 minutes (about eight, walking slowly). The bride's walk takes 20 seconds to a minute.
• A very short ceremony with only one woman in the bride's party ran on two songs.
• Silence is the recommendation for readings, unity rituals, signings and vows.
• The exit song plays through in about three to five minutes, and the handoff to cocktail hour needs a smooth ending.

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